Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
