I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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