it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
