So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
My breasts were aching with rage.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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