Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize