i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize