How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Randomize
