but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
