Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
