i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
