my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i will never coherently bang her
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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