Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize