Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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