Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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