The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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