Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
