so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
smell my finger.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
She tied me up with her honor cords...
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
