maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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