i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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