I bet he comes in French.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
