Who wears a wallet chain?!
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
