please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
