hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Randomize
