I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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