In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
