I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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