Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize