I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
