Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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