uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
