Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
