why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
