I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
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