i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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