so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
