Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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