I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
