why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
