just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Randomize
