I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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