so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
How does one acquire holy water?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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