i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
