Don't make out with my wife yet
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
