So drunk, too bad you don't want this
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
