Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
