Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
where does the pee come out of this thing
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
