You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I AM VODKA MAN
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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