Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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