he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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