He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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